Americans are nosy

Well, being back in the U.S. is certainly unusual. I've been fairly sick the last few days, I think because of the climate and altitude change between Quito and my home, the fact that I went from eating fairly healthy Ecuadorian food to processed American crap, and the fact that I spent 12 full hours in an airport/on a plane.

You'd think I'd have gotten sick after arriving in Quito and having to change from everything I was used to, but no. That change was fine. It was the switch back that got me.

I'm seriously considering moving to Quito. Not only are my health problems minimal there, but my transition is secondary to everything else.

The first thing I did upon arriving in the U.S. was go through customs. The inspection was a barrage of "ma'am" and "miss" from the officers. I don't know if it was something specific to Ecuador or just that I wasn't paying attention, but I don't remember a single person referring to me with a female title. Yeah, a few people slipped up and called me ella instead of el, but when it came to gendered titles, I don't recall any being attached to me. But from the moment I've set foot back here, every "ma'am" and "miss" I hear echoes even louder in my brain, like people are deliberately saying, "I'M GOING TO CALL YOU A GIRL OUT OF SPITE AND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT!"

I really miss Ecuador.

A big difference I noticed was that when I was in Ecuador, people really didn't question much. They just went with the flow. If we were planning on going to a certain restaurant for lunch, and then someone announced that we were going somewhere else, there would be very few questions. Mostly the response from everyone was, "Okay, cool. Let's go."

It was the same with my transition. If I mentioned it to someone in Ecuador, I got very few questions. The response would generally be:

a) "Okay. Cool."
b) "You're not drunk enough. Have more whiskey."

If I mention it to someone in the U.S., the variety of responses are more like:

a) "What makes you feel that way?"
b) "What does your family think of that?"
c) "How many people know?"
d) "Are you getting surgery?"
e) "Are you on hormones?"
f) "Do you see a doctor for that kind of thing?"
g) "How many years of therapy do you need before you can start hormones/get surgery?"
h) "Do you bind your breasts?"
i) "Why doesn't your binding make them flatter?" (Maybe because my boobs are more like continents than actual breasts...)
j) "Do your employers know?"
k) "Are you planning on telling future employers?"
l) "How do people usually react when you tell them?"
m) "How supportive are your parents?"
n) "Are your parents contributing money to your transition?"
o) "Do you get a lot of awkward questions about it?"

People, Americans are f*cking nosy. Seriously, if you were transitioning, would you want any of those questions directed at you? I don't know about you, but that's not typically information that I'm comfortable giving out to someone I've just met.

Granted, if you're someone I've known for a while, the situation is different. I have no problem telling someone I'm familiar with about my transition. But if I just met you, I do not want to give out details about my therapy, my financial situation, or my family in relation to my transition. Actually, I probably wouldn't want to give someone I just met details about any of that in relation to ANYTHING, let alone my transition.

Yes, I'm a very open person. But seriously. There are limits. These limits have been made a lot more clear to me since I came back from Ecuador where nobody f*cking cares about your personal life as long as you're getting drunk and/or having a good time.

I'm definitely moving there. I bet it's better than Antarctica.